Ah yes “sustainability”. Whaling is such a sustainable industry that basically every civilized nation has banned it. That’s okay though, we’ve proven that we’re really good at farming and fishing sustainably, so I’m sure we’ll be just as good at whaling. We definitely aren’t fishing the oceans to extinction, or releasing millions of tons of methane from factory cattle farming.

Oh wait…

It takes a lot less time to grow a new cow than it does to grow a new whale.

I gave it the honest try myself and just didn’t have fun. I went to a couple different planets, died in some weird gravity reversing situation a couple times, died to the loop a few times, etc. It was neat but wasn’t for me. I can see how people would get really into it though.

PLAY OUTER WILDS

Okay but like whats the game about? What do you do?

I CAN’T TELL YOU JUST PLAY IT BRO.

But like, how do I know if it’s even the type of game I will li-

JUST PLAAAAAAAYYYYY IIITTTTTTTT

Sorry if this is a dumb but I legit never got into Twitter, and I only use Instagram to follow friends and bands I like.

How do I Mastadon? I’m not being sarcastic, not even a little. Like I literally have absolutely no concept of what I’m supposed to do on it or how to engage with it. Same with pixelfed tbh, like I open it, I see a milliong posts that have no comments or likes, I get confused and then I leave.

Like what do you do? How do you use it? Pretend I’m one of the idiot journalists this post is making fun of, happy to jump on that self-accepting sword!