If airplanes had a 1/3 chance of crashing for the first several years of commercial aviation, I don’t think many folks would be all too open to being told “you don’t hate airplanes, you hate crashing, we can fly safely too”

And you gotta keep in mind that big tech wants to be the government

Just because I’ve had to go from getting hammered and committing petty crimes to having about 2 beers and being in bed before too late…

I’d say I miss watching the sunrise, but I wake up in time to see it. It was always more beautiful when you’re still up for it…

Yeah we’re middle aged punks now!

Well yeah, Israel doesn’t want peace

In our defense, Italians kept coming here and eating Parmesan. It makes sense we’d pronounce it closer to the Italian

I may only speak English, but I really don’t speak whatever they’re talking in England

If she hadn’t become a vociferous anti civil rights activist the reality is a lot of us would still be tired of the books and frustrated with elements of them, but there’d be less anger when they come up. There were plenty of people getting real sick of how popular they’d remained in the mid 10s.

I read them all as a kid and loved them, but I was definitely tired of how much cultural space they took up for so fucking long. And the criticisms are valid, the books did an amazing job of inspiring obsession in a kid of the time, they felt like they grew with me, they had so much room to imagine in, and they were also full of holes, mid prose, and the sort of issues I’m kinda shocked my parents didn’t feel the need to have a conversation about.

But also, would people be as vocal about these issues if it wasn’t the largest media franchise under individual control and controlled by someone who has funded massive rollbacks in rights for a group she’s bigoted towards? Obviously not, we’d just still be saying to read another book, not arguing not to continue purchasing products from the franchise.

I hate Miller too, but let’s not bring the guy accused of serial rape back into office unless he’s fully exonerated

I don’t think your wife having sex with someone else (idk if they were together yet at the time), especially a serial rapist, makes you necessarily gay

We need to switch to being vocally anti ALPR and mass surveillance

And here I was confused why coulombs were being used as a charging rate…

We need to abandon the “use a letter for this unit/property” crap and accept that the alchemists and accountants had it right.

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Yeah batteries have been one of the main areas where the real technological advances have been happening in the past decade. That and photovoltaics

Yeah the supreme court only decided free press applies to adult porn access in the late 20th century

I love this implication that they really can’t comprehend that those of us who oppose it largely don’t use it.

Yeah, it’s a physically and emotionally brutal recovery process. I’m grateful I did it, but I also don’t really think you can be fully prepared for it. And if your daughter has an opiate allergy be aware that makes it harder. Idk if I’ve ever been in more physical pain than the first week. You’re exhausted, in pain, may have been off your hormones for a month and your junk looks like a wreck and doesn’t work and you’re terrified of if it’s going to heal right. And much like how fully healing is long and slow, so is getting through the difficult part.

And yeah I get where you’re coming from and assume you’re pushing to help her become more functional if possible. And while I understand your fears and worries relating to your involvement, it’s good that the doctors won’t talk to you directly.

Idk about Montreal, but in the US I needed three letters of recommendation to get insurance to pay for surgery (surgeons need 1-3 depending): an endocrinologist/primary care physician saying I’ve been on hormones for at least a year, a psychiatric professional saying that I was fit to make the decision, and a therapist (I think it had to be one I hadn’t seen before) to say that I’d seriously thought it through and understood what it entailed. That’s about as thorough as it can and should be.

But in general by making sure she’s talked to people who’ve been through it and with a therapist that says she’s prepared for it, it should be something she can handle. If the surgeon is wrong for her there are others though it’ll be harder. It’s a difficult balance of speed, quality, and availability and yeah it’s better for her to figure out her path and what mental work she’ll need to do sooner rather than towards the end of a waitlist

Yeah, I’d recommend looking into the surgeon’s reputation, (and have her look at their work). I actually was fortunate enough to see my surgeon’s work in person beforehand, which was helpful, but absolutely not necessary.

Over on reddit there’s a trans_surgeries subreddit that I used to get realistic expectations and my ex used to read it to figure out how best to support me. I can’t however give it a full throated recommendation as it’s absolutely where dysphoria goes to become dysmorphia. My ex would get frustrated with how many people over there passed perfectly for cis and would insist they need more FFS or something.

In general though, if your daughter is able IRL trans community is great, especially with people further along in transition. And talking to people irl and online who have been through the procedures she wants (ideally at various stages) is great.

Naughty things like acknowledging that they’re the exact sort of governmental overreach and violence our declaration of independence had a problem with? Stuff like acknowledging that they’re tyrannical morons engaging in violence against the common people? Or like acknowledging that they all belong in prison?

Ok yeah the advice I always heard about bottom surgery (and found to be true) is that all it’ll change is your genitals. It won’t make you pass better unless you’re in something super tight or naked. It won’t make you feel better about yourself except genital dysphoria.

Has she had open conversations with post op trans women about it? That may be a good step for her.